[story] aya (working title) #3

On 2008-10-21, Red Dragon <agclurker.TakeThisOut@lurkerson.net> wrote:
> emmel wrote:
>> Thus Neo spoke:
>>
>>> emmel wrote:
>>>> On 2008-10-21, Neo <what.TakeThisOut@thematrix.is> wrote:
>>>>> It is typical of girls to think they are ugly and repulsive and thus
>>>>> having a problem with someone they love saying otherwise. Plastic
>>>>> surgery is the solution to this for most girls but me for myself, I find
>>>>> all things resulting from cosmetic surgery repulsive by their very
>>>>> nature.
>>>> ::nods::
>>>> At least the so called beauty surgery. Reconstructive surgery (also
>>>> cosmetic) is an entirely other matter altogether.
>>> I would rather avoid my gf ever needing reconstructive surgery. But you
>>> can't cheat fate. Like her only having one breast in the future, happens
>>> to a lot of women.
>>
>> I find it completely all right to fix that.
>
> I'm really not sure what the best way of dealing with one breast would
> be. I'd feel off balance with an implant just as much as with nothing
> there.

I heard it is pretty bad psychological wise. Not that I want to find out
or even can find out for that matter.

>>>>> I think what it boils down to for me in a relation is 'What does it make
>>>>> you feel like when you hold each other'. If that feels good there is no
>>>>> reason to switch boy-/girlfriends for me. You can't have mister perfect,
>>>>> because for you mister perfect doesn't exist. And even if he does, what
>>>>> makes you think you would be misses perfect for him?
>>>> Now the last part is just mean. Of course thinking of yourself as the
>>>> perfect parter is an integral part of being Mr/Ms Perfect.
>>> Who ever told you love can't be mean?
>>
>> Me. And I trust me.
>>
>>> Especially girls can be terribly mean because they have to carry your
>>> sperm around for nine months and because they haven't got any other
>>> (physical) way of being mean.
>>
>> Huh?
>>
>>> Girls can be TREMELY mean!
>>
>> Erm, what?
>
> Yeah, I'm pretty lost too.

Good, I thought it was just me.
--
emmel <the_emmel*you-know-what-that's-for*@gmx.net>
(Don't forget to remove the ** bit)

story backlogs available at http://ranira.wordpress.com

Official AGC feedback maniac

"God is playing creatures - and we're the norns."

"A hundred dead are a tragedy - a hundred thousand are statistics."

"I guess you can call yourself lucky." -
"I could, but Linda suits me a little better...
Things called lucky tend to get hit by trucks."

Proud owner of 1 (one) DISOBEDIENCE point.
Former owner of 1 (one) eating point (eaten, sigh).

Hi, I'm a .sig virus. Just copy me to your .signature. And don't worry.

On 2008-10-21, Red Dragon <agclurker.RemoveThis@lurkerson.net> wrote:
>
> You know, watching a soap opera stresses me the heck out. This is why I
> tend to avoid them.

Sounds extremely reasonable to me.
--
emmel <the_emmel*you-know-what-that's-for*@gmx.net>
(Don't forget to remove the ** bit)

story backlogs available at http://ranira.wordpress.com

Official AGC feedback maniac

"God is playing creatures - and we're the norns."

"A hundred dead are a tragedy - a hundred thousand are statistics."

"I guess you can call yourself lucky." -
"I could, but Linda suits me a little better...
Things called lucky tend to get hit by trucks."

Proud owner of 1 (one) DISOBEDIENCE point.
Former owner of 1 (one) eating point (eaten, sigh).

Hi, I'm a .sig virus. Just copy me to your .signature. And don't worry.

On 2008-10-21, Neo <what.TakeThisOut@thematrix.is> wrote:
> emmel wrote:
>> On 2008-10-21, Neo <what.TakeThisOut@thematrix.is> wrote:
>>> Red Dragon wrote:
>>
>>>> My dignity prevents me from
>>>> competing with that and it takes it's toll. Not that I'd feel any better
>>>> if I traded in my button-downs and black jeans for impossibly short
>>>> shorts and push-up bras under camisoles.
>>> So you're an emo or a goth?
>>
>> Erm, what the hell are you talking about? There are people out there
>> wearing black jeans and button-down without being either. I for one
>> (although I prefer less buttons and blue jeans, actually). Well, I guess
>> you could argue I fit into the emo category...
>
> You and me fall into the Nerd category I fear.
> Diploma-less I am afraid so no chance of a big and beautiful house and
> likewise interior.

Nothing wrong with being a Nerd.

>>> And push-up bras may look great, they feel lousy for a guy.
>>
>> You tried them on? <veg>
>
> I might, but my chest would be too big Besides, they look better on
> my gf.

Well, you'd have to know.

>>> Unless you
>>> like the feel of cardboard or whatever they put in those things!
>>
>> I don't even want to know...
>
> You think 'they' stay up all by themselves?

Well, there's all this wire frame stuff they used and then you can do
amazing jobs by sewing the cloth properly. Using rubber bands helps,
too. I don't think cardboard would be very washable, BTW, and those
things *have* to be washed.
--
emmel <the_emmel*you-know-what-that's-for*@gmx.net>
(Don't forget to remove the ** bit)

story backlogs available at http://ranira.wordpress.com

Official AGC feedback maniac

"God is playing creatures - and we're the norns."

"A hundred dead are a tragedy - a hundred thousand are statistics."

"I guess you can call yourself lucky." -
"I could, but Linda suits me a little better...
Things called lucky tend to get hit by trucks."

Proud owner of 1 (one) DISOBEDIENCE point.
Former owner of 1 (one) eating point (eaten, sigh).

Hi, I'm a .sig virus. Just copy me to your .signature. And don't worry.

emmel wrote:
> On 2008-10-21, Red Dragon <agclurker.DeleteThis@lurkerson.net> wrote:
>> emmel wrote:
>>> Thus Neo spoke:
>>>
>>>> emmel wrote:
>>>>> On 2008-10-21, Neo <what.DeleteThis@thematrix.is> wrote:
>>>>>> It is typical of girls to think they are ugly and repulsive and thus
>>>>>> having a problem with someone they love saying otherwise. Plastic
>>>>>> surgery is the solution to this for most girls but me for myself, I find
>>>>>> all things resulting from cosmetic surgery repulsive by their very
>>>>>> nature.
>>>>> ::nods::
>>>>> At least the so called beauty surgery. Reconstructive surgery (also
>>>>> cosmetic) is an entirely other matter altogether.
>>>> I would rather avoid my gf ever needing reconstructive surgery. But you
>>>> can't cheat fate. Like her only having one breast in the future, happens
>>>> to a lot of women.
>>> I find it completely all right to fix that.
>> I'm really not sure what the best way of dealing with one breast would
>> be. I'd feel off balance with an implant just as much as with nothing
>> there.
>
> I heard it is pretty bad psychological wise. Not that I want to find out
> or even can find out for that matter.
>

Sounds plausible. They are a pretty big part of the physical feminine
identity. I already feel kind of unfeminine with my, ahem, modest
features...

emmel wrote:
> On 2008-10-20, Red Dragon <agclurker.RemoveThis@lurkerson.net> wrote:
>> emmel wrote:
>>> On 2008-10-19, Red Dragon <agclurker.RemoveThis@lurkerson.net> wrote:
>>>> emmel wrote:
>>>>> Thus Red Dragon spoke:
>>>>>
>>>>>> emmel wrote:
>>>>>>> Thus Red Dragon spoke:
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>> That's the thing. I have a boyfriend who thinks I'm great. It's
>>>>>>>> hard to believe it when just one person says it.
>>>>>>> You don't trust him?
>>>>>> He's one of the most trusted people in my life. I've just been
>>>>>> accidentally conditioned to take any compliments or praise as the person
>>>>>> is "just being nice." Even my straights A's in school.
>>>>> ::hands Red Dragon a bottle of conditioner::
>>>>> Time to do some reconditioning, I'd say.
>>>> ::inspects the bottle::
>>>> Just as long as you're sure this is conditioner, and not brain wash.
>>> No worry, I have no intention to clean out your dirty little thoughts.
>> Who told you about those?!
>
> Guess.
>

Intellect devourers?

>> Uh, I mean... What are you talking about? I think nothing but the purest
>> of thoughts. I'm a perfect lady, thank you.
>
> Ah yes. And the one has what to do with the other exactly?

Well, supposedly a lot in crazy-old-fashioned-land. But now I distracted
by the urge to read too much into that comment.

Red Dragon wrote:
> emmel wrote:
>> Thus Neo spoke:
>>
>>> emmel wrote:
>>>> On 2008-10-21, Neo <what.DeleteThis@thematrix.is> wrote:
>>>>> It is typical of girls to think they are ugly and repulsive and thus
>>>>> having a problem with someone they love saying otherwise. Plastic
>>>>> surgery is the solution to this for most girls but me for myself, I
>>>>> find
>>>>> all things resulting from cosmetic surgery repulsive by their very
>>>>> nature.
>>>> ::nods::
>>>> At least the so called beauty surgery. Reconstructive surgery (also
>>>> cosmetic) is an entirely other matter altogether.
>>> I would rather avoid my gf ever needing reconstructive surgery. But you
>>> can't cheat fate. Like her only having one breast in the future, happens
>>> to a lot of women.
>>
>> I find it completely all right to fix that.
>
> I'm really not sure what the best way of dealing with one breast would
> be. I'd feel off balance with an implant just as much as with nothing
> there.

I would prefer my gf to forgo the implant should this happen. Off
balance or not.

>>>>> I think what it boils down to for me in a relation is 'What does it
>>>>> make
>>>>> you feel like when you hold each other'. If that feels good there
>>>>> is no
>>>>> reason to switch boy-/girlfriends for me. You can't have mister
>>>>> perfect,
>>>>> because for you mister perfect doesn't exist. And even if he does,
>>>>> what
>>>>> makes you think you would be misses perfect for him?
>>>> Now the last part is just mean. Of course thinking of yourself as the
>>>> perfect parter is an integral part of being Mr/Ms Perfect.
>>> Who ever told you love can't be mean?
>>
>> Me. And I trust me.
>>
>>> Especially girls can be terribly mean because they have to carry your
>>> sperm around for nine months and because they haven't got any other
>>> (physical) way of being mean.
>>
>> Huh?
>>
>>> Girls can be TREMELY mean!
>>
>> Erm, what?
>
> Yeah, I'm pretty lost too.

Then we are all lost! Because I had a pretty lousy experience with one
girl, so it does happen. The more persistent and kind you are, the more
they act like you are not there.

Young males have killed themselves for lesser reasons.

Neo
--
Everything that has a beginning has an end.

emmel wrote:
> On 2008-10-21, Neo <what.DeleteThis@thematrix.is> wrote:
>> emmel wrote:
>>> On 2008-10-21, Neo <what.DeleteThis@thematrix.is> wrote:
>>>> Red Dragon wrote:
>>>>> My dignity prevents me from
>>>>> competing with that and it takes it's toll. Not that I'd feel any better
>>>>> if I traded in my button-downs and black jeans for impossibly short
>>>>> shorts and push-up bras under camisoles.
>>>> So you're an emo or a goth?
>>> Erm, what the hell are you talking about? There are people out there
>>> wearing black jeans and button-down without being either. I for one
>>> (although I prefer less buttons and blue jeans, actually). Well, I guess
>>> you could argue I fit into the emo category...
>> You and me fall into the Nerd category I fear.
>> Diploma-less I am afraid so no chance of a big and beautiful house and
>> likewise interior.
>
> Nothing wrong with being a Nerd.

I find that hard to believe.

>>>> And push-up bras may look great, they feel lousy for a guy.
>>> You tried them on? <veg>
>> I might, but my chest would be too big Besides, they look better on
>> my gf.
>
> Well, you'd have to know.

I am NOT going to buy a bra my size.

>>>> Unless you
>>>> like the feel of cardboard or whatever they put in those things!
>>> I don't even want to know...
>> You think 'they' stay up all by themselves?
>
> Well, there's all this wire frame stuff they used and then you can do
> amazing jobs by sewing the cloth properly. Using rubber bands helps,
> too. I don't think cardboard would be very washable, BTW, and those
> things *have* to be washed.

It is those old fashioned bras with the iron wire underneath that are
increasingly hard to get according to my gf. Besides, she tells me not
to bend the wire inside them when we are on the couch together. So I
guess every bra has a downside.

Neo
--
Everything that has a beginning has an end.

Red Dragon wrote:
> Neo wrote:
>> emmel wrote:
>>> On 2008-10-21, Neo <what RemoveThis @thematrix.is> wrote:
>>>> emmel wrote:
>>>>> Thus Neo spoke:
>>>>>
>>>>>> emmel wrote:
>>>>>>> Thus Neo spoke:
<snip>
>>>>>>>>>> A telescope is not much use on a flat though You need a
>>>>>>>>>> very dark
>>>>>>>>>> backyard for the best results!
>>>>>>>>> Trust me, a backyard isn't ideal either. You need some elevated
>>>>>>>>> point,
>>>>>>>>> else all you can see are stars quite far up.
>>>>>>>> So you need a *big* very dark backyard ;-D And you will probably
>>>>>>>> want to
>>>>>>>> cut some trees depending on which object you want to gaze at.
>>>>>>> And probably some houses.
>>>>>> Or a farm.
>>>>> Ah, the good old times... Did I just say that aloud?
>>>> I am more a small city kind of guy.
>>>
>>> Small cities tend to be near farms, though.
>>
>> Not in Holland. We only got Commercial and Resident areas (Simcity).
>>
>> Neo
>
> What about Industrial areas?

They have all been relocated to other (cheaper) countries.

Neo
--
Everything that has a beginning has an end.

On 2008-10-22, Neo <what RemoveThis @thematrix.is> wrote:
> Red Dragon wrote:
>> Neo wrote:
>>> emmel wrote:
>>>> On 2008-10-21, Neo <what RemoveThis @thematrix.is> wrote:
>>>>> emmel wrote:
>>>>>> Thus Neo spoke:
>>>>>>
>>>>>>> emmel wrote:
>>>>>>>> Thus Neo spoke:
><snip>
>>>>>>>>>>> A telescope is not much use on a flat though You need a
>>>>>>>>>>> very dark
>>>>>>>>>>> backyard for the best results!
>>>>>>>>>> Trust me, a backyard isn't ideal either. You need some elevated
>>>>>>>>>> point,
>>>>>>>>>> else all you can see are stars quite far up.
>>>>>>>>> So you need a *big* very dark backyard ;-D And you will probably
>>>>>>>>> want to
>>>>>>>>> cut some trees depending on which object you want to gaze at.
>>>>>>>> And probably some houses.
>>>>>>> Or a farm.
>>>>>> Ah, the good old times... Did I just say that aloud?
>>>>> I am more a small city kind of guy.
>>>>
>>>> Small cities tend to be near farms, though.
>>>
>>> Not in Holland. We only got Commercial and Resident areas (Simcity).
>>>
>>> Neo
>>
>> What about Industrial areas?
>
> They have all been relocated to other (cheaper) countries.

Bummer.
--
emmel <the_emmel*you-know-what-that's-for*@gmx.net>
(Don't forget to remove the ** bit)

story backlogs available at http://ranira.wordpress.com

Official AGC feedback maniac

"God is playing creatures - and we're the norns."

"A hundred dead are a tragedy - a hundred thousand are statistics."

"I guess you can call yourself lucky." -
"I could, but Linda suits me a little better...
Things called lucky tend to get hit by trucks."

Proud owner of 1 (one) DISOBEDIENCE point.
Former owner of 1 (one) eating point (eaten, sigh).

Hi, I'm a .sig virus. Just copy me to your .signature. And don't worry.

On 2008-10-22, Red Dragon <agclurker.RemoveThis@lurkerson.net> wrote:
> emmel wrote:
>> On 2008-10-21, Red Dragon <agclurker.RemoveThis@lurkerson.net> wrote:
>>> emmel wrote:
>>>> Thus Neo spoke:
>>>>
>>>>> emmel wrote:
>>>>>> On 2008-10-21, Neo <what.RemoveThis@thematrix.is> wrote:
>>>>>>> It is typical of girls to think they are ugly and repulsive and thus
>>>>>>> having a problem with someone they love saying otherwise. Plastic
>>>>>>> surgery is the solution to this for most girls but me for myself, I find
>>>>>>> all things resulting from cosmetic surgery repulsive by their very
>>>>>>> nature.
>>>>>> ::nods::
>>>>>> At least the so called beauty surgery. Reconstructive surgery (also
>>>>>> cosmetic) is an entirely other matter altogether.
>>>>> I would rather avoid my gf ever needing reconstructive surgery. But you
>>>>> can't cheat fate. Like her only having one breast in the future, happens
>>>>> to a lot of women.
>>>> I find it completely all right to fix that.
>>> I'm really not sure what the best way of dealing with one breast would
>>> be. I'd feel off balance with an implant just as much as with nothing
>>> there.
>>
>> I heard it is pretty bad psychological wise. Not that I want to find out
>> or even can find out for that matter.
>>
>
> Sounds plausible. They are a pretty big part of the physical feminine
> identity. I already feel kind of unfeminine with my, ahem, modest
> features...

I bet they are /quite/ feminine. Besides, large breasts are no more
functional than small ones, and the big ones *are* known to put a lot of
unwanted stress on your back and stuff.
--
emmel <the_emmel*you-know-what-that's-for*@gmx.net>
(Don't forget to remove the ** bit)

story backlogs available at http://ranira.wordpress.com

Official AGC feedback maniac

"God is playing creatures - and we're the norns."

"A hundred dead are a tragedy - a hundred thousand are statistics."

"I guess you can call yourself lucky." -
"I could, but Linda suits me a little better...
Things called lucky tend to get hit by trucks."

Proud owner of 1 (one) DISOBEDIENCE point.
Former owner of 1 (one) eating point (eaten, sigh).

Hi, I'm a .sig virus. Just copy me to your .signature. And don't worry.

On 2008-10-22, Neo <what RemoveThis @thematrix.is> wrote:
> emmel wrote:
>> On 2008-10-21, Neo <what RemoveThis @thematrix.is> wrote:
>>> emmel wrote:
>>>> On 2008-10-21, Neo <what RemoveThis @thematrix.is> wrote:
>>>>> Red Dragon wrote:
>>>>>> My dignity prevents me from
>>>>>> competing with that and it takes it's toll. Not that I'd feel any better
>>>>>> if I traded in my button-downs and black jeans for impossibly short
>>>>>> shorts and push-up bras under camisoles.
>>>>> So you're an emo or a goth?
>>>> Erm, what the hell are you talking about? There are people out there
>>>> wearing black jeans and button-down without being either. I for one
>>>> (although I prefer less buttons and blue jeans, actually). Well, I guess
>>>> you could argue I fit into the emo category...
>>> You and me fall into the Nerd category I fear.
>>> Diploma-less I am afraid so no chance of a big and beautiful house and
>>> likewise interior.
>>
>> Nothing wrong with being a Nerd.
>
> I find that hard to believe.

Then maybe you aren't one after all?
<eg, d&rlh>

>>>>> And push-up bras may look great, they feel lousy for a guy.
>>>> You tried them on? <veg>
>>> I might, but my chest would be too big Besides, they look better on
>>> my gf.
>>
>> Well, you'd have to know.
>
> I am NOT going to buy a bra my size.

I didn't say you ought to.

>>>>> Unless you
>>>>> like the feel of cardboard or whatever they put in those things!
>>>> I don't even want to know...
>>> You think 'they' stay up all by themselves?
>>
>> Well, there's all this wire frame stuff they used and then you can do
>> amazing jobs by sewing the cloth properly. Using rubber bands helps,
>> too. I don't think cardboard would be very washable, BTW, and those
>> things *have* to be washed.
>
> It is those old fashioned bras with the iron wire underneath that are
> increasingly hard to get according to my gf. Besides, she tells me not
> to bend the wire inside them when we are on the couch together. So I
> guess every bra has a downside.

There really have to be better ways...
--
emmel <the_emmel*you-know-what-that's-for*@gmx.net>
(Don't forget to remove the ** bit)

story backlogs available at http://ranira.wordpress.com

Official AGC feedback maniac

"God is playing creatures - and we're the norns."

"A hundred dead are a tragedy - a hundred thousand are statistics."

"I guess you can call yourself lucky." -
"I could, but Linda suits me a little better...
Things called lucky tend to get hit by trucks."

Proud owner of 1 (one) DISOBEDIENCE point.
Former owner of 1 (one) eating point (eaten, sigh).

Hi, I'm a .sig virus. Just copy me to your .signature. And don't worry.

On 2008-10-22, Neo <what.DeleteThis@thematrix.is> wrote:
> Red Dragon wrote:
>> emmel wrote:

>> I'm really not sure what the best way of dealing with one breast would
>> be. I'd feel off balance with an implant just as much as with nothing
>> there.
>
> I would prefer my gf to forgo the implant should this happen. Off
> balance or not.

Just remember that it's her choice when the question arises.

>>>> Girls can be TREMELY mean!
>>>
>>> Erm, what?
>>
>> Yeah, I'm pretty lost too.
>
> Then we are all lost! Because I had a pretty lousy experience with one
> girl, so it does happen. The more persistent and kind you are, the more
> they act like you are not there.

I'm afraid that is due to the human nature. Tough luck. There are
exceptions, though (at least I hope).

> Young males have killed themselves for lesser reasons.

The 'lesser' is in the eye of the beholder.
--
emmel <the_emmel*you-know-what-that's-for*@gmx.net>
(Don't forget to remove the ** bit)

story backlogs available at http://ranira.wordpress.com

Official AGC feedback maniac

"God is playing creatures - and we're the norns."

"A hundred dead are a tragedy - a hundred thousand are statistics."

"I guess you can call yourself lucky." -
"I could, but Linda suits me a little better...
Things called lucky tend to get hit by trucks."

Proud owner of 1 (one) DISOBEDIENCE point.
Former owner of 1 (one) eating point (eaten, sigh).

Hi, I'm a .sig virus. Just copy me to your .signature. And don't worry.

emmel wrote:
> On 2008-10-22, Neo <what.TakeThisOut@thematrix.is> wrote:
>> Red Dragon wrote:
>>> emmel wrote:
>
>>> I'm really not sure what the best way of dealing with one breast
>>> would be. I'd feel off balance with an implant just as much as
>>> with nothing there.
>> I would prefer my gf to forgo the implant should this happen. Off
>> balance or not.
>
> Just remember that it's her choice when the question arises.
>
>>>>> Girls can be TREMELY mean!
>>>> Erm, what?
>>> Yeah, I'm pretty lost too.
>> Then we are all lost! Because I had a pretty lousy experience with
>> one girl, so it does happen. The more persistent and kind you are,
>> the more they act like you are not there.
>
> I'm afraid that is due to the human nature. Tough luck. There are
> exceptions, though (at least I hope).

Plenty of exceptions. Surprisingly, every woman is different. You can't
rent out space in your psyche to one person who hurt you. Why give so
much power to someone who probably doesn't even remember such events?

That said, I do that too anyway... Like two older women that told me I
needed to go back to public school because 'clearly' homeschooling
wasn't doing me any favors.

In any case, I cannot begin to speculate what went wrong with that one
girl, except that you were chasing the wrong girl. As a friend with
unsolicited advice though... I'd be careful with that self description
of "persistent and kind." It's quite open to interpretation, and in the
end, you don't know how you're coming off to the girl.

And, well... If a woman just isn't attracted to you, their
interpretation of your behavior becomes less charitable. And there's
plenty of women out there that just don't know any people skills in that
kind of interaction.

But that's my two cents (or perhaps two dollars). Don't let one bad
experience taint your view on everybody else. People can sense when you
think poorly of them and will react.